Lizards Have Personalities

by Lizards Have Personalities

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11:07

credits

released July 29, 2014

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this is our adieu. <3

mae m. - skramz vox/guitar/drums
paul w. - hxc vox/bass

recorded/mixed/mastered by mae m.

art by the amazing dominic sohor: www.dominicsohor.com

tags

license

all rights reserved
Track Name: Mononoke
we've wasted the most beautiful sceneries
poisoned the oceans
polluted the sky
spat at the sinking soil
eradicated species
but the ends don't justify the means

mother Earth unleash your fury
rally the troops
summon the plague
charge the trenches
demolish the village
leave no prisoners
there is no escape

we destroy that which gives us life
without blinking an eye
no sympathy
no remorse
no mercy
this isn't a cycle
it's a slaughter
combat this devolution
ignite the revolution

we are a disease with only one cure
[kill the humans! save the forest!]
Track Name: Eta Carinae
mold my flesh with your finger tips
replace this polluted air with your breaths
this is our moment in time
brief and delicate but elegant

this has no purpose
but that's what makes it perfect
though absent of speech we said everything
with just an embrace
a prolonged gaze
bathing in the light of stars
long since burnt out

peel my flesh with your finger tips
sink your teeth into me before I wake up from this dream
Track Name: A Letter to Clotho
I did not consent to existence
I am not content with existing
yet I'm so scared of death
so why am I so obsessed?
I'm terrified of life
so why even try?

I am an accident
I'm a mistake
I'm insignificant
I am a waste
I'm just a grain of sand
on one beach
of one ocean
on one planet

I am a hypocrite
I am a fake
I'm insignificant
I am a waste
I'm just a bag of bones
sulking, sleeping and shitting life away
and that's all I'll ever be

my thread wasn't spun quite the way it should've been
Track Name: Hedonistic Calculus
sleeping on hardwood floors
to avoid familiar scents
sketching dreams for a sign
that anything holds meaning

[routine regret relapse]
I shoved my fist down my throat
[routine regret relapse]
force fed myself false hope
[routine regret relapse]
my stomach rejected the sight of it
[routine regret relapse]
I threw up blood but refuse to quit

I'm obsessed with a reoccurring dream
the one in which you slaughter me
that hubristic smirk on your face
leaves me wanting more, needing more
if I am but a pawn in this game
I'm honorably bestowed that fate
consider me an unyielding slave
I'm yours forever, my Liege
Track Name: A Letter to Lachesis
I'm held hostage by my own flesh
I peel it off but it scabs up quickly
I'm weighed down by my own bones
I sand them to dust but they're twice as heavy
I'm suffocated by my own lungs
I cough them up but they crawl back in me
I'm disgusted by my own thoughts
I black them out but they return swiftly

I miss the sting of your hands around my throat
the stench of your spit on my face
the mock of your laugh when I speak
I need the pang of sex in my veins
friction scars covering my knees
I'm addicted to love that is fake

I'm not sure
I'm still me
but I am sure
I don't care
I've tasted sweat
I've bathed in it
and I am sure
I'm sold

the spindle fell off its axis
hence the miscalculation
it sunk through the Earth like a casket
my thread is far too long
I doused my soul in acid
it wept as the noose tightened around it
I grinned at its plight for redemption
my thread is far too long
Track Name: Monstrum in Fronte, Monstrum in Animo
rusty nails in my flesh
paint thinner on my breath
shards of glass in my teeth
barbed wire around my neck
black widows in my bed
methods to induce sleep

I amputated my arms
but they grew back just to spite me
you decapitated my head
but were surprised to see it smirking
I sewed my heart to my sleeve
so you could watch it beating
you held it in your palm
and crushed it without blinking

I'm not sure which one of us is the monster

lets play a game called 'how over dramatic and self-loathing can I fucking be?'
we're both waiting for me to die
and last night I saw a shooting star
can you guess on what I wished for?
how long will it take to replace me?
forget my face, erase me
exorcise those memories
slit the throat of our history
you can do anything that you want
just don't pretend to miss me when I'm gone
Track Name: The Last Oracle of Luud
I prefer the sensation of discomfort
to almost anything I can name or speak of
lately I'm a struggling insect smeared beneath boots
severed limbs flailing, detached from their roots
others would whimper but I'm calmly mute
dizzy from blood loss but blissful in truth

soaking up sun rays
longing for evaporation
scorched upon asphalt
my middle name is desperation
the tingle of disintegration
addictions that I've yet to shake
this exoskeleton aches to be dust
bathing in star light
demanding for swift transpiration
tangled in silk webs
haunted by the realization
euphoric as the fangs sink in
a craving that just can't be faked
this abdomen begs to be pierced
drowning in desire
lusting for vaporization
clinging to carnage
I refute this respiration
anxious for extermination
obsessed with this imminent fate
in time these limbs will severe themselves

there is no life left to drain from me
Track Name: A Letter to Atropos
I have no motivation to carry on
I force my conversations
a connoisseur of faking smiles
keeping distance from the people that misjudge me
I keep distance from everybody

I wish I could be a naive child again
the weight of the world didn't crush me then
I accepted life
no, I welcomed it
but I've grown up

I've opened my eyes
[I see no light, no savoir]
I've accepted my fate
[I'm not afraid]

cut the thread!
Track Name: Tartarus
I try to piece myself together
but solemn memories slip through inept fingers
objects trigger a response just out of reach
always desiring the intangible
so why am I still surprised to fail?
hyperalgesia
bed sheets against skin
another barricade
another excuse to hide
another night counting seconds
with clenched fists concealing regrets
and force fed 'it's not your faults'
but I know it is
staring at the same ceiling from four years ago
so nostalgic, romanticizing depression
repeating the words: "I'm piss. I'm shit. I'm less than nothing."
the only thing I'm certain of is I'm uncertain of everything
so secure in my insecurities
blasé to the sunrise and pigments in eyes that once warmed my heart
accustom to frosty breath, awkward smiles and apathetic last words
time transforms friends into lovers into acquaintances into strangers
and I forget my own name waiting on storms that never passed
so many wasted nights drawing interstates over veins that led to nowhere
panic attacks bringing laughter, broken mirrors and holes in the wall
objects trigger a response just out of reach
but here I am with my arms stretched out, still reaching

though this world is depressing and unbearable
I cannot simply fly away for I am not a bird

I spent endless years sculpting wings from feathers and wax
but as with Icarus they melted away at the first sign of light
so I retreat to the dark, awaiting redemption
though I'm not an angel
I'm quite the contrary
death still terrifies me
I'm broken, I'm weary
maybe one day I'll find solace in seclusion
but for now I'm just struggling to carry on despite this disease

I've been peeling off my flesh in my sleep
biting through my tongue when I speak
clawing at my eyes, ripping out my own heart
I've been grinding down my teeth while I dream
licking the shine off blades when I scream
severing my throat, coughing up my own lungs
I've been picking at my brain in my sleep
downing chloroform when I speak
sawing off my nails, throwing up my own blood
I've been sanding down my bones while I dream
chewing shards of glass when I scream
pulling out my spine, gnawing at own arms

out of boredom
depression
disgust
desperation
out of anxiety
obsession
isolation
clichés

[the thread's been spun, measured and cut]
I'm a ghost feasting on remains no one wants
[the thread's been spun, measured and cut]
I'm a phantom whispering through the walls

the stench of my own rotting corpse is lulling me to sleep